Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Tiger's whisker


Once upon a time, a young wife named Yun Ok was at her wit's end. Her husband had always been a tender and loving soulmate before he had left for the wars but, ever since he returned home, he was cross, angry, and unpredictable. She was almost afraid to live with her own husband. Only in glancing moments did she catch a shadow of the husband she used to know and love.

When one ailment or another bothered people in her village, they would often rush for a cure to a hermit who lived deep in the mountains. Not Yun Ok. She always prided herself that she could heal her own troubles. But this time was different. She was desperate.

As Yun Ok approached the hermit's hut, she saw the door was open. The old man said without turning around: "I hear you. What's your problem?"

She explained the situation. His back still to her, he said, "Ah yes, it's often that way when soldiers return from the war. What do you expect me to do about it?"

"Make me a potion!" cried the young wife. "Or an amulet, a drink, whatever it takes to get my husband back the way he used to be."

The old man turned around. "Young woman, your request doesn't exactly fall into the same category as a broken bone or ear infection."

"I know", said she.

"It will take three days before I can even look into it. Come back then."

Three days later, Yun Ok returned to the hermit's hut. "Yun Ok", he greeted her with a smile, "I have good news. There is a potion that will restore your husband to the way he used to be, but you should know that it requires an unusual ingredient. You must bring me a whisker from a live tiger."

"What?" she gasped. "Such a thing is impossible!"

"I cannot make the potion without it!" he shouted, startling her. He turned his back. "There is nothing more to say. As you can see, I'm very busy."

That night Yun Ok tossed and turned. How could she get a whisker from a live tiger?

The next day before dawn, she crept out of the house with a bowl of rice covered with meat sauce. She went to a cave on the mountainside where a tiger was known to live. She clicked her tongue very softly as she crept up, her heart pounding, and carefully set the bowl on the grass. Then, trying to make as little noise as she could, she backed away.

The next day before dawn, she took another bowl of rice covered with meat sauce to the cave. She approached the same spot, clicking softly with her tongue. She saw that the bowl was empty, replaced the empty one with a fresh one, and again left, clicking softly and trying not to break twigs or rustle leaves, or do anything else to startle and unsettle the wild beast.

So it went, day after day, for several months. She never saw the tiger (thank goodness for that! she thought) though she knew from footprints on the ground that the tiger - and not a smaller mountain creature - had been eating her food. Then one day as she approached, she noticed the tiger's head poking out of its cave. Glancing downward, she stepped very carefully to the same spot and with as little noise as she could, set down the fresh bowl and, her heart pounding, picked up the one that was empty.

After a few weeks, she noticed the tiger would come out of its cave as it heard her footsteps, though it stayed a distance away (again, thank goodness! she thought, though she knew that someday, in order to get the whisker, she'd have to come closer to it).

Another month went by. Then the tiger would wait by the empty food bowl as it heard her approaching. As she picked up the old bowl and replaced it with a fresh one, she could smell its scent, as it could surely smell hers.

"Actually", she thought, remembering its almost kittenish look as she set down a fresh bowl, "it is a rather friendly creature, when you get to know it." The next time she visited, she glanced up at the tiger briefly and noticed what a lovely downturn of reddish fur it had from over one of its eyebrows to the next. Not a week later, the tiger allowed her to gently rub its head, and it purred and stretched like a house cat.

Then she knew the time had come. The next morning, very early, she brought with her a small knife. After she set down the fresh bowl and the tiger allowed her to pet its head, she said in a low voice: "Oh, my tiger, may I please have just one of your whiskers?" While petting the tiger with one hand, she held one whisker at its base and, with the other hand, in one quick stroke, she carved the whisker off. She stood up, speaking softly her thanks, and left, for the last time.

The next morning seemed endless. At last her husband left for the rice fields. She ran to the hermit's hut, clutching the precious whisker in her fist. Bursting in, she cried to the hermit: "I have it! I have the tiger's whisker!"

"You don't say?" he said, turning around. "From a live tiger?"

"Yes!" she said.

"Tell me", said the hermit, interested. "How did you do it?"

Yun Ok told the hermit how, for the last six months, she had earned the trust of the creature and it had finally permitted her to cut off one of its whiskers. With pride she handed him the whisker. The hermit examined it, satisfied himself that it was indeed a whisker from a live tiger, then flicked it into the fire where it sizzled and burned in an instant.

"Yun Ok", the hermit said softly, "you no longer need the whisker. Tell me, is a man more vicious than a tiger? If a dangerous wild beast will respond to your gradual and patient care, do you think a man will respond any less willingly?"

Yun Ok stood speechless. Then she turned and stepped down the trail, turning over in her mind images of the tiger and of her husband, back and forth. She knew what she could do.

Monday, July 15, 2013

Good story

A Business executive was deep in debt and could not see any way out. 

Creditors and Suppliers were demanding payments. He sat in the park, wondering if anything could save his company from bankruptcy. 

Suddenly an old man appeared before him and asked, "I can see that something is troubling you seriously".

After listening to the executive the old man said, "I believe I can help you". He asked the...man his name, wrote out a cheque and put it into his hands saying, "Take this money, meet me here exactly one year from today and you can pay me back at that time". Then he turned and disappeared as quickly as he had come.

The business executive saw in his hands a cheque for $ 500,000 signed by Warren Buffet, one of the richest men in the world. "I can erase my worries instantly" he realized. But instead, the executive decided to put the uncashed cheque in his safe knowing that it might give him the strength to work out to save his business and to use this only in case of dire emergency. With changed thinking he negotiated better deals, restructured his business and worked rigorously with full zeal
and enthusiasm and got several big deals. Within few months, he was out of debt and started making money once again.

Exactly one year later he returned to the park with the uncashed cheque. As agreed, the old man appeared. But just as the executive was about to hand him back the cheque and share his success story, a nurse came running up and grabbed the old man. "I’m so glad I caught him" she cried. "I hope he hasn’t been bothering you much. He always escapes from the mental hospital and tells people that he is Warren Buffet", saying this she took the old man away. The surprised executive just stood there, stunned! All year long he had been dealing thinking that he had half a million dollars behind him.

Its not the money, real or imagined that turns our life around. It is our newly found self-confidence that gives us the power to achieve anything we want....

Friday, December 21, 2012

MARRIED OR NOT, YOU SHOULD READ THIS ...

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

''कर्तव्य मेरा सर्वोपरि''

एक लड़के के आपात आपरेशन के लिए एक फोन के बाद डाक्टर जल्दी जल्दी अस्पताल में प्रवेश करते हैं....उन्होंने तुरंत अपने कपडे बदल कर सर्जिकल गाउन पहना, ऑपरेशन के लिए खुद को तैयार किया और ऑपरेशन थियेटर की तरफ चल पड़े...हॉल में प्रवेश करते ही उनकी नज़र लड़के की माँ पर जाती है...जो उनका इंतज़ार करती जान पड़ती थी और बहुत व्याकुल भी लग रही थी....

डॉक्टर को देखते ही लड़के की माँ एकदम गुस्से से बोली : आपने आने इतनी
देर क्यों कर दी..? आपको पता नहीं है कि मेरे बेटे की हालत बहुत गंभीर है..? आपको अपनी जिम्मेदारी का अहसास है की नहीं..??
डॉक्टर मंद मंद मुस्कुराते हुए कहता है : मैं अपनी गलती के लिए आपसे माफ़ी मांगता हूँ...फोन आया तब मैं अस्पताल में नहीं था,जैसे ही खबर मिली मैं तुरंत अस्पताल के लिए निकल पड़ा..रास्ते में ट्रैफिक ज्यादा होने की वजह से थोड़ी देर हो गयी. अब आप निश्चिन्त रहो मैं आ गया हूँ भ
गवान की मर्ज़ी से
सब ठीक हो जाएगा..अब आप विलाप करना छोड़ दो..''

इस पर लड़के की माँ और ज्यादा गुस्से से : विलाप करना छोड़ दूं मतलब..? आपके कहने का मतलब क्या है..? मेरे बच्चे को कुछ हो गया होता तो.? इसकी जगह आपका बच्चा होता तो आप क्या करते..?? डॉक्टर फिर मंद मंद मुस्कुराते हुए : शांत हो जाओ बहन, जीवन और मरण वो तो भगवान के हाथ में है, मैं तो बस एक मनुष्य हूँ, फिर भी मैं मेरे से जितना अच्छा प्रयास हो सकेगा वो मैं करूँगा..बाकी आपकी दुआ और भगवान की मर्ज़ी..! क्या अब आप मुझे ऑपरेशन थियेटर में जाने देंगीं.?? डॉक्टर ने फिर नर्स को कुछ सलाह दी और ऑपरेशन रूम में चले गए..

कुछ घंटे बाद डॉक्टर प्रफुल्लित मुस्कान लिए ऑपरेशन रूम से बाहर आकर लड़के की माँ से कहते हैं : भगवान का लाख लाख शुक्र है की आपका लड़का सही सलामत है, अब वो जल्दी से ठीक हो जाएगा और आपको ज्यादा जानकारी मेरा साथी डॉक्टर दे देगा..ऐसा कह कर डॉक्टर तुरंत वहां से चल पड़ते हैं..

लड़के की माँ ने तुरंत नर्स से पुछा : ये डॉक्टर साहब को इतनी जल्दी भी क्या थी.? मेरा लड़का होश में आ जाता तब तक तो रूक जाते तो क्या बिगड़ जाता उनका..? डॉक्टर तो बहुत घमंडी लगते हैं''
ये सुनकर नर्स की आँखों में आंसू आ गए और कहा : ''मैडम ! ये वही डॉक्टर हैं जिनका इकलौता लड़का आपके लड़के की अंधाधुंध ड्राइविंग की चपेट में आकर मारा गया है..उनको पता था की आपके लड़के के कारण ही उनके इकलौते लड़के की जान गयी है फिर भी उन्होंने तुम्हारे लड़के की जान बचाई है...और जल्दी वो इसलिए चले गए क्योंकि वे अपने लड़के की अंतिम क्रिया अधूरी छोड़ कर आ गए थे...

MORAL: ''कर्तव्य मेरा सर्वोपरि''

Nice , worth reading..




An old man, staying in a small south Indian town came to visit his son in Bombay recently. The son in his early thirties is a successful businessman living with his wife and son. The father, having spent most of his life at his birthplace, hardly understands a splatter of Hindi or English, forget Marathi. But he doesn't care. 'I have come here to spend a few days with my son and his family. I don't have to go out and socialize with the city people,' he said.
 
But the son is very excited about his father's rare visit to Bombay. He wants to make the best of it. He and his wife want to show him around the city. And yes, the son enjoys those evening hours too, when  he and his father go out and sit in a good bar, sipping their favorite  drink.

 
Last week he was in a very good mood. 'Let's go to a five star hotel's bar tonight,' he told his father. It was a beautiful evening. Talking about everything under the sun they had a few drinks. As usual they were offered some salad, peanuts, wafers etc .as accompaniments with their drinks. The old man being almost toothless was not much interested in eating. But that day when they got up to leave, he simply took a handful of chana (roasted grams) and stuffed it in the  fold of his dhoti. He might have thought about munching on them, sitting in the car, or whatever. Unfortunately while walking in the lobby, he missed a step and stumbled. Down he went, scattering the chana on the plush carpet.
 
No problem .Now try to visualize that scenario. Someone else in his son's place would have been mortified, embarrassed to death. He might have cursed not his father but his own self for causing this awkward situation. 'Never again will I take my old man to such hotels', he would have vowed.
No sir, not this son. Gently, with a smile, he helped his father get back on his feet. Instead of feeling irritated or angry, he was amused. He found the whole incident very funny. Laughing, they both went home and on the way they decided to return to the same place the following Sunday.
The old man liked the place and liked the chana too. 
 
Few days back, at a friend's place they both described this event and made everybody laugh.
Weren't you embarrassed? Somebody asked the son.  'Oh, come on now' replied    the son. 'He is my father. He talks in his native language, prefers to wear a dhoti even to a posh city hotel, takes chana from the bar to eat later, does whatever he feels like.... So what?
Why should I feel embarrassed with his nature and habits? Nobody has a right to stop him from doing whatever he feels comfortable with, as long as it is not harmful to others.'
 
The son doesn't care what the staff in the hotel thought about that incident. He says 'they should be concerned only with their bills and tips. I am concerned about my father's happiness.'  The wife too totally agrees with the husband on this issue. She feels there are enough other qualities in her father- in- law to feel proud of.  Accept them .The above incident is not mentioned just to show the love  and devotion of a son for his father. More than love it is a matter of understanding and a healthy respect for the other person's lifestyle.
  
A seventy plus old man doesn't want to change his lifestyle now. He likes the way he eats or dresses or talks. In his eyes there is nothing wrong with the old ways of living. And the son says, ok, fine. Every body has a right to live as per his wish. Now at his age, why should he be forced to learn to eat with a fork and knife, if he doesn't want to? I will feel bad if he is doing something morally wrong or indulging in some harmful activities. But otherwise it is fine. I am not going to try to change him at this stage. He is my father. I love him, respect him.
 
Hey folks, can you think this way? So many times we see people getting embarrassed by the so called unsophisticated behavior of their family members. They keep on apologizing about their lack of class and manners or about their drawbacks to outsiders. My wife can't speak proper English; she doesn't know what's happening in the world, so I avoid taking her out or introducing her to my friends and business associates... My parents can't eat with a  spoon and fork, so I don't take them to restaurants My husband is  working as an ordinary clerk, so I feel awkward when I introduce him  to my rich friends.  My brother is mentally challenged, so I don't feel like going out with him... 

Are you plagued with such thoughts or do you meet such people who think alike? If you do, please ask yourself. Why do others or I feel this way? Really what is there to feel ashamed of? Most of the people always have this fear of other peoples' opinions and comments. What would others say? 
 
Nothing.. You are what you are..
    
Have a nice day.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

CARROT, EGG OR COFFEE


A daughter complained to her father about life and how hard things are for her. She said she wanted to give up as she was tired of struggling. For just as one problem was solved, another arose. Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen, filled three pots with water and placed the fire on high. Soon the three pots came to a boil. In one he placed carrots, in the other he placed eggs and in the last he placed ground coffee beans. He let them sit and boil, without saying a word. The daughter wondered what he was trying to do.
In half an hour he turned down the fire and took out the contents of the pots and put them in bowls. Turning to her he said, “My dear child, what do you see?” Smartly
she replied, “Carrots, eggs and coffee.”
He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After shelling it, she observed it was hard-boiled now. Finally, he asked her to take a sip of the fragrant coffee. She winced as it was very strong.
Humbly, she asked, “What does it mean father?” He explained, “Each of them faced the same adversity, 100oC of boiling water. However, each reacted differently. The carrot was strong, hard and unrelenting. But, after going through boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg was fragile. A thin outer shell protected a liquid centre. But after sitting in the boiling water, the inside became hardened. However, the coffee beans are unique. After they were in the boiling water, they became stronger and richer. Which one of these are you?” he asked.

Are you the carrot that seems hard but with the smallest amount of pain, adversity or heat, you wilt and become soft with no strength? Are you the egg, which starts off with a malleable heart? But after a death, breakup, divorce or layoff become hardened and stiff? Your shell looks the same but you are bitter and tough inside. Or are you
like the coffee bean? The bean does not get its true flavour until it reaches 100oC. When the water gets hotter, it just tastes better. When things are at their worst, you get better.
So how do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?
"Everyone is an explorer.
How could you possibly live your life looking at a door and not opening it?"

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Donkey's attitude- Can we imitate?

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.
He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.
A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.
As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!
MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.